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    • A Brief History of Tea
    • Philosophy of Tea >
      • Harmony
      • Humility
      • Respect
      • Creativity
    • Guidelines for the Host/Hostess >
      • Gathering and Greeting
      • Sharing Stories
      • Sharing Food
      • Sending the Guests Home
    • Guidelines for the Guest >
      • Respect Your Hostess/Host
      • Bring a Gift if You Wish
      • Practice Humility
      • Monitor Your Conversation
      • Arrive with a Grateful Attitude
      • Help if Help is Needed
      • Do Not Criticize
      • Leave Gracefully
      • Send a Thank You Note
    • A Checklist for Planning a Tea Party
    • Teas of the World and How to Make Tea >
      • A Sampling of Teas
      • Herbal Teas and Tisanes
      • How to Make Tea
      • Making Iced Tea
      • Tea Concentrate
      • Brewing Tea for a Crowd
    • Tea Utensils and Accessories >
      • Tea Kettle
      • Tea Pot
      • Tea Cozy
      • Teacups
      • Plates
      • Silverware
      • Teacart
      • Tea Strainer
      • Tea Infuser
      • Three-Tiered Server
      • Cream Pitcher and Sugar Bowl
      • Cake Pedestal
      • Trifle Bowl
      • Jam Pots
      • Serving Dishes, Platters, and Trays
      • Silver Tea Set or Silver Tray
      • Linens
      • Kitchen Equipment for Food Preparation
    • Tea Menu Basics >
      • Sandwiches and Savories
      • Savory Spreads and Dips
      • Scones and Tea Breads >
        • About Lemons
    • Afternoon Tea and the Four Seasons >
      • A Spring Tea
      • An Outdoor Summer Tea
      • An Autumn Afternoon Tea
      • A Winter Afternoon Tea
    • A Calendar of Tea Parties >
      • January: A Japanese New Year’s Tea
      • February: A Valentine’s Day Tea
      • March: A St. Patrick’s Day Irish Tea
      • April: An Easter Tea
      • May: A Mother’s Day Tea
      • June: A Wedding Reception Tea >
        • Lemon Yogurt Wedding Cake
      • July: A Picnic Tea
      • August: A Family Reunion Tea >
        • A North American Family Reunion Tea
        • An Eastern Mediterranean Family Reunion Tea
        • A Kosher Family Reunion Tea
        • A Scandinavian Family Reunion Tea
      • September: An Ozark Farm Harvest Tea
      • October: A Tea to Honor Our Ancestors (Dia de los Muertos)
      • November: A Post Thanksgiving Tea
      • December: A Christmas Tea >
        • In Defense of Fruitcake: Fruitcakes and Candied Fruit
    • A World of Tea Parties >
      • A Chinese Dim Sum Tea
      • A Portuguese Tea
      • A Classic British Afternoon Tea
      • An Indian Chai Party
      • A California Tea
      • A Hawaiian Tea
      • An Italian Tea
      • An American Southern Tea
      • A Russian Tea
      • A French Afternoon Tea
      • A Kosher Tea with Tradional Jewish Foods
    • Afternoon Tea for Special Occasions >
      • An Afternoon Tea for Children
      • A Tea for Our Elders
      • A Honey Bee Tea in the Garden
      • An Urban Tea on the Go
      • Tea for One
      • Afternoon Tea for a Large Group
      • A Vegan Tea
      • A Rose Tea
  • Purchase Recipes
  • Resources
    • Bibliography and Resources
    • Menu and Recipe Index
    • Commercial Food Products
    • Glossary

Sharing Stories and Conversation

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As your guests arrive, it is your responsibility to set the tone for the conversation. Make sure that you introduce all the guests to each other if they are not already acquainted. It is not necessary to mention what any of them do for a living, since afternoon tea conversation does not focus on the guests’ careers or their social status. You might place an interesting serving piece or work of art in the room as a focal point for conversation.

In the traditional Japanese tea ceremony, it is customary for the guests to handle the items that will be used during the service and admire them, commenting on the colors, textures, connection with the season, etc. A guest might pick up one of the tea cups, turn it around in his hands, and even turn it over and look at the bottom. This process is called haiken in Japanese, and is roughly translated as “admiring the tea objects.” There may not be an equivalent word in English.

American guests may have been trained as children not to pick up pieces of china and look at the brand name on the bottom. Therefore, you will need to guide your guests to focus on the items that you have placed in the tea environment for their enjoyment. Imagine that your first two guests have arrived and are commenting gratefully about how cozy it is by the fire compared to the harsh weather outside. When your third guest arrives, she walks through the door complaining loudly about another driver who cut her off in traffic on her way to your home. As she prepares to recite this entire narrative to everyone else in the room, you gently intervene by guiding her to a comfortable chair and saying, “We’re so glad to see you, Monica. Why don’t you sit next to this pine-scented candle. I was thinking of you when I made it. Can you smell the pine?”

Incidentally, if you do use scented candles or potpourri to create the setting for afternoon tea, you will want to extinguish them and whisk any other scented items away before the third element of the afternoon—sharing food—begins. Many people find non-food related scents disturbing while they are eating.


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Copyright © 2015 by Epilogics
  • Home
  • About/Blog
    • Who We Are
    • Our Credentials
    • Tea Travels - Rose's Blog
    • Cakes and Tea - Kathleen's Blog
    • Contact Us
  • The Tea Book
    • The Road Back to Civilization
    • A Brief History of Tea
    • Philosophy of Tea >
      • Harmony
      • Humility
      • Respect
      • Creativity
    • Guidelines for the Host/Hostess >
      • Gathering and Greeting
      • Sharing Stories
      • Sharing Food
      • Sending the Guests Home
    • Guidelines for the Guest >
      • Respect Your Hostess/Host
      • Bring a Gift if You Wish
      • Practice Humility
      • Monitor Your Conversation
      • Arrive with a Grateful Attitude
      • Help if Help is Needed
      • Do Not Criticize
      • Leave Gracefully
      • Send a Thank You Note
    • A Checklist for Planning a Tea Party
    • Teas of the World and How to Make Tea >
      • A Sampling of Teas
      • Herbal Teas and Tisanes
      • How to Make Tea
      • Making Iced Tea
      • Tea Concentrate
      • Brewing Tea for a Crowd
    • Tea Utensils and Accessories >
      • Tea Kettle
      • Tea Pot
      • Tea Cozy
      • Teacups
      • Plates
      • Silverware
      • Teacart
      • Tea Strainer
      • Tea Infuser
      • Three-Tiered Server
      • Cream Pitcher and Sugar Bowl
      • Cake Pedestal
      • Trifle Bowl
      • Jam Pots
      • Serving Dishes, Platters, and Trays
      • Silver Tea Set or Silver Tray
      • Linens
      • Kitchen Equipment for Food Preparation
    • Tea Menu Basics >
      • Sandwiches and Savories
      • Savory Spreads and Dips
      • Scones and Tea Breads >
        • About Lemons
    • Afternoon Tea and the Four Seasons >
      • A Spring Tea
      • An Outdoor Summer Tea
      • An Autumn Afternoon Tea
      • A Winter Afternoon Tea
    • A Calendar of Tea Parties >
      • January: A Japanese New Year’s Tea
      • February: A Valentine’s Day Tea
      • March: A St. Patrick’s Day Irish Tea
      • April: An Easter Tea
      • May: A Mother’s Day Tea
      • June: A Wedding Reception Tea >
        • Lemon Yogurt Wedding Cake
      • July: A Picnic Tea
      • August: A Family Reunion Tea >
        • A North American Family Reunion Tea
        • An Eastern Mediterranean Family Reunion Tea
        • A Kosher Family Reunion Tea
        • A Scandinavian Family Reunion Tea
      • September: An Ozark Farm Harvest Tea
      • October: A Tea to Honor Our Ancestors (Dia de los Muertos)
      • November: A Post Thanksgiving Tea
      • December: A Christmas Tea >
        • In Defense of Fruitcake: Fruitcakes and Candied Fruit
    • A World of Tea Parties >
      • A Chinese Dim Sum Tea
      • A Portuguese Tea
      • A Classic British Afternoon Tea
      • An Indian Chai Party
      • A California Tea
      • A Hawaiian Tea
      • An Italian Tea
      • An American Southern Tea
      • A Russian Tea
      • A French Afternoon Tea
      • A Kosher Tea with Tradional Jewish Foods
    • Afternoon Tea for Special Occasions >
      • An Afternoon Tea for Children
      • A Tea for Our Elders
      • A Honey Bee Tea in the Garden
      • An Urban Tea on the Go
      • Tea for One
      • Afternoon Tea for a Large Group
      • A Vegan Tea
      • A Rose Tea
  • Purchase Recipes
  • Resources
    • Bibliography and Resources
    • Menu and Recipe Index
    • Commercial Food Products
    • Glossary